The theme for this year’s New Zealand Mental Health Awareness week is Belonging Matters.
The theme for this year’s New Zealand Mental Health Awareness week is ‘Belonging Matters. The Mental Health Foundation writes:
Research shows that a strong sense of belonging is closely linked to better mental health outcomes. Supportive relationships, connection to community, and trust in others all contribute to improved wellbeing and overall health. However, for many people, these social connections are becoming harder to maintain.
About social connection
Ministry of Health data shows that the percentage of people across New Zealand who are experiencing severe loneliness (feeling lonely all or most of the time) is higher now than it was pre-Covid . This suggests that the problem is increasing, but how can an individual know if their social connections are sufficient to meet their needs?
Julianne Holt-Lunstad, lead researcher on loneliness and social connection has identified three pillars of healthy social connection:
Structure – Having sufficient size and diversity in our social network and sufficient frequency of social interactions.
Function: Support – Having people we can rely on in a crisis and who can count on us.
Quality: Satisfaction – Having high-quality relationships that are satisfying and supportive, as opposed to low-quality connections that are characterized by frequent conflicts and stress.
Social connection self-check
Breaking down social connection into these three pillars makes it easier to do a self-check. Doing so is especially important when life changes disrupt usual patterns of social interaction. For older people, changes that can affect social patterns include retirement, late life separation or divorce, becoming a caregiver, bereavement, loss of health and mobility, sensory losses, needing to move home, losing the ability to drive.
Even if life is stable and things seem to be going well, a self-check can be useful as a baseline. Then, when life changes occur, it is easier to understand how patterns of connection with others are affected. Social needs differ from one person to another, but useful questions to reflect on could be:
Structure
- Am I satisfied with the amount of social connection that I have during a typical week?
- Do I feel I spend too much time alone?
- Do I get out as much as I would like to?
Function: Support
- Are there people I can call on if I need help?
- Would I feel comfortable doing so?
- Are there people who can count on me?
Quality : Satisfaction
- Do I have people I can confide in?
- Do I have relationships that make me happy?
- Do I have relationships that make me feel drained or stressed?
- Do I feel a sense of belonging to a group or groups (family or community)?
Finding solutions
Honest self-reflection can be challenging. It is easy to dismiss feelings of loneliness and to tell ourselves and others that we are ‘fine’. If that’s not true though, loneliness can become chronic. Over time, this can have serious impacts on health and wellbeing. A first step is to understand that loneliness and social isolation are common issues, especially during times of change.
If a self-check suggests that there is a lack in the quantity or quality of social connections, it’s important to do something about it. For those who are healthy, mobile, digitally connected, and confident self-help may be sufficient. The solutions for each person will be different, but there is a range of self-help suggestions here.
Others will have barriers to overcome that require more support. The good news is that help is available. Age Concerns around the country offer a range of services and group activities and many offer in-home visits. Find contact details for local Age Concerns here, or call us on 0800 65 2 105 to find out more.
Another thing that can be very helpful is to book an appointment with a Health Improvement Practitioner or Health Coach, available at no cost in most medical centres. These practitioners work with people to identify ways to improve health and wellbeing and connect them to support as needed.
Small steps over time can make a big difference to feeling more connected.
